i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize