Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
