This girl is more easily done than said...
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
