There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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