Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Randomize
