508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
