is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
