My first STD was from a foam party
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
