uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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