there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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