so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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