would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
You took a bar mat shot.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
