When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
