Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
