I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
