Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize