Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
