I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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