Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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