K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize