Too much gin, very little bucket
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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