That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize