I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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