but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
