he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
