She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
