I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
