i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
So vagazzling was a success
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
