So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Randomize
