well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
