i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
