dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
whose ass print is on the piano?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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