Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize