he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I just gift wrapped bread.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
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