Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
