Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
