Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
