when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
His hands were made for my vagina.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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