forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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