so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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