I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
So much rum. So many feels.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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