yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
You did what with his pubic hair?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize