don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
