awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize