I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Randomize
