i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
