come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
