My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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