Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize