he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize