You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
