the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
